When Enough is Enough

Went out to dinner Friday with Country D to celebrate one of our friends b-days. I wasn't feeling to well and I just wanted to eat take a couple of pics and head to the house. Nothing big nothing major. I ended up driving and it was raining,(hate driving in the rain) so I was already a little agitated. We get there and it is the usual bunch. everyone with their boyfriends except two young ladies. And of course our personal gay boy extraordinaireB.L. B.L. and I have gotten really close since he came out to me. I don't know what made him come out to me but he did. He has more boy drama then anyone I know. And he has a hard time keeping it to himself. That is a subject all in it's own for another blog lol. The birthday girl was a diva as usual. Always looks nice. She is younger then us but only buy a year and even though she is taller we are still the big sisters lol. She was the only one at this event that even knew that me and Country D had ever dated besides B.L. They are very good at keeping secrets.


It was a jappanesse style restaurant. I had never been to the type where they cook the food in front of you and have the fire and everything it was pretty nice until he put the mushrooms in front of me. I am very allergic!!! He didn't cook any of my food by them so that made me a little better. He was a very entertaining cook I will give him that. The birthday girl was there with her new boo. He seemed like a nice enough young man. I wish her well she deserves it. He seems to take care of her good which is all that matters to me. I don't want to have to run up on him for messing with my boo boo lol. I didn't say much to Country D during dinner. We shared a meal cus my eyes bout fell on the floor when I saw the prices on the meals. Everything was way to much. I should have expected this from the b-day girl she does it BIG at all times lol. Not a bad thing just not something I can do like that. Not right now anyway. Maybe when my credit cards are gone.


So everyone was deciding to go out to drinks afterwards. I told Country D I didn't feel up to that. She said tht she would ride with the birthday girl. Well the birthday girl informed her that she wasn't going back home,which she doesn't live far from us. B.L. is from the town we live in but he has a new crib that is not close to us. There went her two options. Now for anyone that knows Country D she may say she feels one way but her face tells a completely different story. I could tell in her face she was disappointed,angry, and frustrated all at the same time. So in my to nice ways I offered to take her but we would not stay long. She was so wanting to go cus supposedly we had never been to the lounge place. Well we all leave the restaurant and I tell Country D that I don't want to stay long. Trying to set expectations before we get there. We get there and we have been to that place before. I explain to her when and why we had been there before and she swears up and down that she doesn't remember. It is funny how things can't be remembered when she knows it will stop her from doing something she wants to do. SO we go and she spends way to much money to me on drinks. But I am the broke one so what can I say.



On the way home I say something to her about not saying thank you for taking her to get the drinks afterwards. And the next thing I know we are in a full out fight in the car *sigh*. I hate arguing with Country D because it never goes anywhere. Especially because she never feels like she does anything wrong. She throws back in my face that I didn't thank her for paying for dinner. I gave her part of the money when we were there and told her I would give her the rest when I got home to change. But of course she didn't hear that part at the restaurant. So when we got home I gave her even more money then she deserves. Since I lost my job she has been paying most of the bills in the house and well every chance she gets she brings up how she does that and how she has paid for something. Not once when we first moved into a real apartment and not a collegiate one did i ever go around telling everyone under the moon that I was paying most of the bills at some point. She tries to make me feel less then what I am and it makes me so mad. I think that is when our arguments go into completely wrong directions because after that point I don't really care what I say......



So enough is enough. I am not going to say anything else about how I feel to her. Especially not while she is paying for things. I am on a mission to have this be the last month I am behind on bills so everything can go back to normal. Having her in control is going to give me a damn heart attack and I have had to many other things going on as is. She just never wants to sit down and really truly look at herself and how she acts. Reminds me of BFF's ex. We both think that is why they never got along. She was a princess and never wanted to spend her money and Country D is the same way. Am I appreciative for what she has done for me. Absolutely. She hears it all the time, she gets little gifts here or there. I do what I can to show that I am forever thankful for what she has done. But it is never enough.........