It is so hard to let go of love. It picks at you every second and you think about it all the time. Country D is starting to move on and well part of me doesn't want her to. She left this morning to spend time with "the other woman". Now I must say for the first time in months she actually didn't lie to me and told me truthfully where she was going. So I guess this is the clean start we needed. But it still hurt all the same. I really loved her. This was my first girl love. Will I have a chance at another? All the women I was interested in or am are either taken or just not feeling me in that way. I am trying to be patient but it is a hard virtue to have. I am happy with myself and enjoy spending time with friends but I am a very affectionate person and I don't like not getting affection in a romantic way. I start my new job next week so hopefully that will help take my mind off of things for awhile. Something new to jump into. I will hopefully meet some new people and be able to see things a little differently since I won't be broke.
ATL from a previous blog will be working not to far away from me. She mentioned it to me the other day when we talked. She is still with her girlfriend,although I still don't think she is happy. But I still won't do anything with her. I just wouldn't want anyone to do that to me. karma is a bitch. And I don't want her entering my life anytime soon. I have to stay in the friend zone and just continue to do me and focus on other people. I do like her a lot but even if they broke up I would still have to give her time and well,time waits for no man. I don't like sitting idle on the sidelines waiting for things to happen. I make life happen. But maybe that is why I have had so much time to myself. It was time for me to sit back and really think about where my life and relationships were going. This is a day of a lot of thinking. Starting the week off with a jumbled mind....
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