Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Happy New Year Goodbye 08 and Hello 09!
Saturday, December 27, 2008
Spoons ,Taboo and a lot of video games
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Merry Christmas to All!
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
The Life and Times of the Jobless...
I need to meet new people,get out more,but dang that Ellen and Young and the Restless pull me back to the TV every time. I wonder sometimes will I not want to get out of this rut,then I realize oh yea I do have those bills to pay.(Looking at my phone at another number calling I can't answer). I leave for Memphis in the morning whoop ee!!( As sarcastic as it can get). I will miss roomie. This is the first time all year we will be away from each other for longer then some hours. I think it might do us good. Get away and reflect on some things. I really wish I could talk to Orange woman before I left. I don't want to take unwanted drama into a new year with me. It seems as though that has been an on going thing year after year and this year I don't want to do it. I really just want to talk to really see if she feels I am this bad person she thinks I am. Considering for once I can honestly say I haven't done anything,it makes me mad. I didn't talk back or bad mouth or even call her out of her name. So why do you hate me so? The world may never know. I may be blogging a lot more in the next couple of days. Simple because 1. I will probably be bored out of my mind and 2. it will be some interesting things going on. ( I haven't been home in a very long time). Oh well back to reading my new fav blog(shout out to Brothers and brown girl gone gay!lol).
Monday, December 22, 2008
So what am I?
Going Home but not feeling totally like I am Wanted
The part I am dreading the most about my trip is my mom's family. I have not felt close to them since she died and well I thought it had gotten better. But it hasn't. I just feel like there is no connection there and as hard as I try to connect I never get anything back . It comes a time when you have to let go of things and this is one thing I have to let go of. We will never be close. Not because of things they have done ,but more so things that have not been done and not be allowed to happen. I guess one day I will feel like my family cares but I doubt that will be this week. Even with the Christmas cheer in the air.
On a brighter note, grandma is happy to see me come home. She wants me to move back but the great city of Memphis is not for me. I loved growing up there but I feel like I would get caught in a rut if I returned. It is just not for me in this stage of my life. But I will be happy to spend a lot of time with her. Never know how much longer I have to do that so I cherish the moments I do get to see her ,even in her crazy moments lol. (not Frankie Keyshia Cole momma crazy but close lol). I also get to see my niece and nephew open up their Christmas gifts for the first time ever!!! I am excited about this even though I couldn't afford to get them anything. I thought about giving my nephew my glass chess set. He loves chess and he would probably do more with it then I am at the moment. Maybe he could grow to be really good at it and get into competitions. Who knows what the future hold. I don't know what I would get my niece. I was never into the girly stuff and I don't have any money to go out and just buy something. I will have to be thought into that one. .....
Well two days and counting and Shelby county here I come. I have some friends I will be seeing. All my junior high buddies. That will be fun. There is one that is gay which is nice. We can talk and be comfortable. So she is my saving grace while I am there as far as that goes and I can't wait to see her either. To Mars and back is how I feel. We will see if that changes in two days..
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Resume and Jobs
I have went from job to job,two of them went bankrupt because of the economy. One let me go because they couldn't afford to keep us. One was making me sick every time I went and it was either the job or my health. I don't know right now what I am going to do. It is getting to a point where bills are not going to get paid. I can;t continue on the path that I am on. Even the hustling isn't doing enough. I apply and apply and apply. And I haven't even received a phone call for a interview.*sigh* Is my resume that bad? I have three different ones. One with a master's degree. one without. One for specific Human resource positions. I have applied for everything from being a secretary, to being a manager. What am I to do!!.
Friday, December 5, 2008
Letting it all out post 143
Christmas time is around and well...no Christmas Spirit for me as far as family goes. I am trying to work on that. Don't know how well it is going to go though. My cousin is getting married. I called,I texted,even emailed,didn't get anything back. I am chalking it up as a lost at this point. Everything on the home front is good for right now. I hope it stays that way. Me and some of my junior high buds are planning a reunion when everyone is home for Christmas. I am much more excited about that then anything else. Some of these people I have not seen since high school. it will be great to catch up and just have genuine fun. I got to dust the ole bowling ball off. ( I might need to sneak in some games before hand lol). Well that is all for now ,more to come over the weekend. Going to do more job applications..*sigh*
Thursday, November 27, 2008
So Thankful!!!
Happy Thanksgiving!!!
I will make it short and sweet, because it is almost time to hit the rode to make my many stops today. But this has been a trying year for me ,where I have gone thru things that I never thought I would but I am still thankful for so many things.
1. To still be alive and healthy(a little cold don't count lol).
2. To have roof over my head and food in my belly. And to be broke I am still quite stylish lol.
3. Thankful for the friends that I have around me. They may be a little crazy but they are there when I need them and I the same for them.
4. Thankful for my dads family.The thoughts and calls are really good for my heart right now. They don't know how appreciated they are.
5. Thankful for the gift of love. You can give it in so many ways and people never really know how that means to a person.
6. Thankful for being blessed by the lord and having a pastor that checks on me and makes sure I am ok. I love my church so much.
7. I am thankful for the new skills I have acquired and will move me into new heights.
8. I am thankful for life and everything that it brings my way good or bad because it makes me the person that I am.
9. I am thankful for knowing that my mom still looks down on me ,as well as all others that I have lost in my life. I share this thanksgiving with them as well.
10. I am thankful for my friends family that takes me in as their own and makes me feel wanted. They will never truly know how that makes me feel.
Everyone have a blessed and safe holiday!!!
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Heartless
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Time Passes
You are put here for a reason and if that is my reason then so be it. It makes me happy when I make them happy. Sometimes I do fail but it is not without trying my hardest. Loyalty is a must and I hold that high and true.You have to be able to tell them what they want to hear and also what they don't. Sometimes with a joking laugh and sometimes with a stern voice. So after tonight's event I again say my quote that I use so often,when others listen to too many people:
"Never let someone Else's opinion become your reality"
Thanks J
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
November 4,2008
To all of those people who struggled. Who couldn't even drink out of a water fountain or eat at a restaurant. That was their day.God does his work in his own time. It is not meant for us to understand. This man's name is in the bible. Judges 4:6. He was sent here for a purpose as all of us are. This is a change that we needed. This is where we will pull strength and finally hopefully come together as a nation. It will take longer then 4 years to right all the wrongs but I have faith we have chosen the man that can do it and convincingly we did so.
November 4,2008-My president is Black.
Signing off...
S.N.J.
Monday, November 3, 2008
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Goodness
Relationships What Does it All Mean
Not talking is and can be the biggest problem in a relationship. Without communication what do you have?I see so many people getting married these days and I wonder,are they really ready?Can you honestly admit that you are willing to talk to that person about anything and everything,even if it means that they may be mad at you. Are you willing to face problems head on?So many questions and issues must be answered when you are in a relationship. And it is never easy when that communication is one sided. It sucks really. I look at the relationships I have had in my life and I wonder,What could I have done differently?What could I have said or not said to make that situation better. It is just a part of it. "I am not scared of Lions,Tigers,or Bears, But I am scared of loving you" Jazmine hit it on the head with that one when it comes to the person that I love. I think Love is something that you want so bad but sometimes it is just not meant to be. You fight for something that you feel is right but is it really?
The impossible task....I wonder if my time on the job is over.............I don't want to loose a friend.
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
One Leaves ,Another Returns
Monday, October 13, 2008
So the Swag contiunes
Diddy check him out lol... and shout out to Diddy i had to put his version up to lol . It is different from the previous one lol.
Diddy version
pat version
Swagger Like Pat from Pat J on Vimeo.
Thursday, October 9, 2008
I miss you
Saturday, September 27, 2008
Have Things in the World Really Changed?
On campus Tuesday, somebody lynched a life-sized cardboard dummy of Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama. George Fox University President Robin Baker said that a custodian found the six-foot cutout of Obama swinging from a tree on campus and removed it – sending a chilling historic flashback through the minds of its African-American students.
Between the late-19th century and mid-20th century, Blacks were routinely lynched throughout the South and Midwest, often for nothing other than having darker skin. Sometimes successful African Americans were lynched by Whites who were merely jealous of their accomplishments.
Obama, a Harvard graduate, Grammy winner, best-selling author and millionaire is the first Black person to land a major-party presidential nomination.
The image of Obama was accompanied by a note: “Act Six reject.” A minority scholarship program at the university is called “Act Six.” Baker told The Associated Press that he met with the students in Act Six who are on full scholarship, noting that he had another meeting scheduled for the entire student body this week.
(From BET.com)
Thursday, September 25, 2008
OBAMA 08 PEOPLE!!
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
The BlackHaven High lol
Are U Registered to Vote???
For those who still can't grasp the concept of white privilege, or who are looking for some easy-to-understand examples of it, perhaps this list will help.
White privilege is when you can get pregnant at seventeen like Bristol Palin and everyone is quick to insist that your life and that of your family is a personal matter, and that no one has a right to judge you or your parents, because 'every family has challenges,' even as black and Latino families with similar 'challenges' are regularly typified as irresponsible, pathological and arbiters of social decay.
White privilege is when you can call yourself a 'fuckin' redneck,' like Bristol Palin's boyfriend does, and talk about how if anyone messes with you, you'll 'kick their fuckin' ass,' and talk about how you like to 'shoot shit' for fun, and still be viewed as a responsible, all-American boy (and a great son-in-law to be) rather than a thug.
White privilege is when you can attend five different colleges in six years like Sarah Palin did (one of which you basically failed out of, then returned to after making up some coursework at a community college), and no one questions your intelligence or commitment to achievement, whereas a person of color who did this would be viewed as unfit for college, and probably someone who only got in in the first place because of affirmative action.
White privilege is when you can claim that being mayor of a town smaller than most medium-sized colleges, and then Governor of a state with about the same number of people as the lower fifth of the island of Manhattan, makes you ready to potentially be president, and people don't all piss on themselves with laughter, while being a black U.S. Senator, two-term state Senator, and constitutional law scholar, means you're 'untested.'
White privilege is being able to say that you support the words 'under God' in the pledge of allegiance because 'if it was good enough for the founding fathers, it's good enough for me,' and not be immediately disqualified from holding office--since, after all, the pledge was written in the late 1800s and the 'under God' part wasn't added until the 1950s--while if you're black and believe in reading accused criminals and terrorists their rights (because the Constitution, which you used to teach at a prestigious law school, requires it), you are a dangerous and mushy liberal who isn't fit to safeguard American institutions.
White privilege is being able to be a gun enthusiast and not make people immediately scared of you.
White privilege is being able to have a husband who was a member of an extremist political party that wants your state to secede from the Union, and whose motto is 'Alaska first,' and no one questions your patriotism or that of your family, while if you're black and your spouse merely fails to come to a 9/11 memorial so she can be home with her kids on the first day of school, people immediately think she's being disrespectful.
White privilege is being able to make fun of community organizers and the work they do--like, among other things, fight for the right of women to vote, or for civil rights, or the 8-hour workday, or an end to child labor--and people think you're being pithy and tough, but if you merely question the experience of a small town mayor and 18-month governor with no foreign policy expertise beyond a class she took in college and the fact that she lives close to Russia--you're somehow being mean, or even sexist.
White privilege is being able to convince white women who don't even agree with you on any substantive issue to vote for you and your running mate anyway, because suddenly your presence on the ticket has inspired confidence in these same white women, and made them give your party a 'second look.'
White privilege is being able to fire people who didn't support your political campaigns and not be accused of abusing your power or being a typical politician who engages in favoritism, while being black and merely knowing some folks from the old-line political machines in Chicago means you must be corrupt.
White privilege is when you can take nearly twenty-four hours to get to a hospital after beginning to leak amniotic fluid, and still be viewed as a great mom whose commitment to her children is unquestionable, and whose 'next door neighbor' qualities make her ready to be VP, while if you're a black candidate for president and you let your children be interviewed for a few seconds on TV, you're irresponsibly exploiting them.
White privilege is being able to give a 36 minute speech in which you talk about lipstick and make fun of your opponent, while laying out no substantive policy positions on any issue at all, and still manage to be considered a legitimate candidate, while a black person who gives an hour speech the week before, in which he lays out specific policy proposals on several issues, is still criticized for being too vague about what he would do if elected.
White privilege is being able to attend churches over the years whose pastors say that people who voted for John Kerry or merely criticize George W. Bush are going to hell, and that the U.S. is an explicitly Christian nation and the job of Christians is to bring Christian theological principles into government, and who bring in speakers who say the conflict in the Middle East is God's punishment on Jews for rejecting Jesus, and everyone can still think you're just a good church-going Christian, but if you're black and friends with a black pastor who has noted (as have Colin Powell and the U.S. Department of Defense) that terrorist attacks are often the result of U.S. foreign policy and who talks about the history of racism and its effect on black people, you're an extremist who probably hates America.
White privilege is not knowing what the Bush Doctrine is when asked by a reporter, and then people get angry at the reporter for asking you such a 'trick question,' while being black and merely refusing to give one-word answers to the queries of Bill O'Reilly means you're dodging the question, or trying to seem overly intellectual and nuanced.
White privilege is being able to go to a prestigious prep school, then to Yale and then Harvard Business school, and yet, still be seen as just an average guy (George W. Bush) while being black, going to a prestigious prep school, then Occidental College, then Columbia, and then to Harvard Law, makes you 'uppity,' and a snob who probably looks down on regular folks.
White privilege is being able to graduate near the bottom of your college class (McCain), or graduate with a C average from Yale (W.) and that's OK, and you're cut out to be president, but if you're black and you graduate near the top of your class from Harvard Law, you can't be trusted to make good decisions in office.
White privilege is being able to dump your first wife after she's disfigured in a car crash so you can take up with a multi-millionaire beauty queen (who you go on to call the c-word in public) and still be thought of as a man of strong family values, while if you're black and married for nearly twenty years to the same woman, your family is viewed as un-American and your gestures of affection for each other are called 'terrorist fist bumps.'
White privilege is when you can develop a pain-killer addiction, having obtained your drug of choice illegally like Cindy McCain, go on to beat that addiction, and everyone praises you for being so strong, while being a black guy who smoked pot a few times in college and never became an addict means people will wonder if perhaps you still get high, and even ask whether or not you ever sold drugs.
White privilege is being able to sing a song about bombing Iran and still be viewed as a sober and rational statesman, with the maturity to be president, while being black and suggesting that the U.S. should speak with other nations, even when we have disagreements with them, makes you 'dangerously naive and immature.'
White privilege is being able to say that you hate 'gooks' and 'will always hate them,' and yet, you aren't a racist because, ya know, you were a POW so you're entitled to your hatred, while being black and insisting that black anger about racism is understandable, given the history of your country, makes you a dangerous bigot.
White privilege is being able to claim your experience as a POW has anything at all to do with your fitness for president, while being black and experiencing racism and an absent father is apparently among the 'lesser adversities' faced by other politicians, as Sarah Palin explained in her convention speech.
And finally, white privilege is the only thing that could possibly allow someone to become president when he has voted with George W. Bush 90 percent of the time, even as unemployment is skyrocketing, people are losing their homes, inflation is rising, and the U.S. is increasingly isolated from world opinion, just because a lot of white voters aren't sure about that whole 'change' thing. Ya know, it's just too vague and ill-defined, unlike, say, four more years of the same, which is very concrete and certain.
White privilege is, in short, the problem.
Monday, September 22, 2008
Given Up at such a YOUNG age
Saturday, September 20, 2008
Where on earth is?
We have only kicked it once. Mostly because I stay in the boro and frankly if I lived in Nashville I wouldn't be hopping down the interstate to see anybody in the boro either. Especially with these gas prices lol. But I enjoy our talks. We have a lot in common and a lot to talk about. We don't have those one word text convos. It is actually something with substance. And I like it lol. As you get older you want friends that you can talk to and be comfortable with. At least me anyway. And in her I see that growing and maturing day by day.We are both seeing people which is cool,we kind of let each other (in) but keep enough distance to stay private. Which allows for more convo but it's at a distance where nothing gets said that shouldn't. I am glad she came into my life and I hope that it continues to blossom into a great friendship. HMMM I wonder if I can find her the show on DVD or something. LOL and as far as the Carmen San Diego goes let's just say for blog purposes this will be her tag name lol.
Night!!
Friday, September 19, 2008
Swagga Like Us
Ok so this whole swagga thing has been on a all time high. But Puffy, Puff Daddy ,P Diddy,Poppi Diddi PoP, hell Ciroq Obama(that shit is really good with some lemonade lol) is swag at it's best. Anyway this video shows the swag. niggas he is what he is. you can hate on the danity kane/day 26 hype. But face it. he still selling more then most artist out there who have a record label. Sean John is blazing as well as all the other ventures he has. Everybody wants to have his swag,the attitude. Forbes is his home get use to it. The man is a beast. I mean really he has like three shows now, who does that but Ciroq Obama. And if you don't remember yes he did a whole post show drunk as hell and was not talked about like he was dumb. Only Puff could do that or pull that off. The swagga is real.
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
What's Up
Are you living or just existing?
I want ,what I want. I want to be happy at work doing something I love. And I want to be happy in my life and love. I don't think that is to much to ask for.In so many instances we focus on just trying to survive day to day instead of reaching for our goals. I am in the process of reaching and stepping out on faith. That's right faith. God has a plan for my life and I plan on living it out. Even if that means going back to school ,that's right a third degree. Some might think I am crazy but I know what I want to do that will make me happy and that is what I want to do. Working with people and helping them with their problems is what I aim to do. And I think I am good at it.
People get paid everyday to have people sit on their couch and tell all their secrets. Maybe it is time for me to open up my couch. So many possibilities for this thinking mind of mine.
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
Young and the Restless
Ok..so in college you know you have those breaks during class. You go home eat,decide whether or not you are going to go to the rest of your classes,and in some cases,who house might you be spending the night at?(or was that just me lol). Anyway a lot of people take the break to watch their fav soap opera or court show. Mine was to watch Young and the Restless. I never was in to those type of shows until my mom got sick. She loved to watch The Price is Right and then stay on for Young and The Restless. Back then it was home to fine Sherman Moore. The ladies loved him but hardly half of them actually watched the show lol. But out of all of the soap operas,Y&R has been number one for over most of my life out of all of them.
Victor Newman...the man who only shows his heart and love to certain people. But shows his black heart to all is the heart of the show and one of my favs. It is amazing now that I have been working later in the day and being able to actually watch it again,how I have been drawn back into it. Even today I actually shed a tear.(lame i know) But it has always taken me back to that time in my life where for the last moments of her life. Me and my mom shared something. It was so special to me to just sit there with her and watch her smile and be happy even during her sickness. We would watch it and then talk about it. Then we would watch music videos for me ,so she could watch me dance. It made her smile. For awhile I didn't watch Y&R ,it was to painful for me because I didn't have her here to watch with me. But now I know,when I sit here all into the story, she is sitting here with me enjoying every moment. Young and the Restless is what I am now,I have to find my way just like Victor did,and I plan on being the best just like him. People doubt me just like they doubted the show. But just like the show,I will make it.And I will have to get into my Victoria Newman mindset. Because you can be successful and still have a heart.
Monday, September 1, 2008
Photography
Sunday, August 31, 2008
So many reasons....
What is there to hide?
I have some friends who will let their significant other look thru their phone ,email and anything else that they may have. Others can look thru the phone but not the email.(the probably don't care about the email). While other people I know won't even let you look thru their phone.
Now I know when you are in a relationship ,that there has to be trust there or there is really nothing to fall back on. I think that once you get to a certain point with a person,i.e. been together a really long time or engaged, It shouldn't matter if that person looks thru your phone. Many times people don't want their "boo" to look thru their phone because that harmless flirting they were doing was much more then they made it off to be. I to myself have been in this situation and well I decided to look thru the phone.
It actually happened twice. And both times I found the answer that I was looking for but was not happy about it either time. It does hurt when someone lies to you to your face and it takes for you to be the private eye to find out. I guess once you get to the point you have to look in phones u should know that it is pretty much some lying going on. You should always go with your first mind. But to the lying party,why lie? In the end you are going to end up with a person that doesn't trust you and you have to try extra hard to get that back. If you can get it back at all. In all the situations of the past month,they have all managed to get their relationships back on track. But at what fault?Less trust in the relationship lingers,there may have been outside people that got hurt for no reason and now people can look at you as a liar. Will you ever be able to recover fully from that. We all hope that love conquers all but does it really?
I think that in a relationship you should be willing to share everything. That doesn't mean that someone should go thru your phone everyday but ,reassuring the person that you are with,that is nothing wrong with that. I think now with the advancements of technology at home and in the work place,dating and being in relationships will continue to get harder and harder. Only time will tell.....
Friday, August 15, 2008
The man is a Beast
Friday, Aug 15, 2008 1:32 pm EDT
The mystery of Michael Phelps' iPod playlist
By Chris Chase
"In the long, storied history of Fourth-Place Medal's Investigative Unit (founded: Monday), one question has been asked by our readers more than any other. Today, on our five-day anniversary, we will attempt to tackle the biggest Olympic mystery of the Beijing Games: what is Michael Phelps listening to on his iPod?
In nearly every camera shot of Michael Phelps on dry land, he can be seen with iPod headphones dangling from his ears. The earbuds are a ubiquitous presence in the ready room and on the starting block; they're just as much a part of Phelps' 'uniform' as goggles and a swim cap. About two minutes prior to the start of a race, Phelps sheds the iPod along with his warm-ups. So, what is he listening to?
Podcasts of NPR's This American Life and Dylan live at The Supper Club. No wait, that's my iPod. Phelps listens to hip-hop music on his. He says it helps motivate him before a race.
While his pre-race tracklist varies, Phelps has said that "I'm Me" by Lil' Wayne has been on his playlist in Beijing. The track, off Weezy's mega-hit "Tha Carter III" features the line:
Yes I am the best/and no I ain't positive I'm definite/I know the game like I'm reffing itThat's about the only lyiric that's printable on a family blog.
Other artists that populate Phelps' iPod include: Jay-Z, Young Jeezy, Eminem and Outkast. (What, no 'Pac?) Occasionally, he'll throw some techno into the mix, but usually keeps things rap-centric. Phelps doesn't speak much about the specific songs he's listening to, but he did tell NBC in 2004 that Eminem's "'Til I Collapse" was on his most-played list at Athens. In 2005, he created a playlist for the website Rhapsody that included the songs "Roses" by Outkast, "Burn" by Usher, "Overnight Celebrity" by Twista and "Smile" by G-Unit.
Mystery: solved.
Lesbian Wars
But of course it wouldn't be called lesbian wars without a little drama right?So she has girlfriend and I have my friend. They met and hit it off and well it got a little to close for comfort and almost ruined their relationships. No it wasn't my friends fault but more so a collective effort. A lot of people playing small parts into a major problem. Needless to say me and the new bff will have to kick it solo for awhile until things cool over. And maybe that is a good thing. It will allow us to get to know each other better and hopefully grow our friendship. And there is nothing wrong with that.
Why is it that jealous can ruin a relationship?I was talking to the new girl and everything was cool until the jealous devil showed it's head about my past(again). I have done everything right this time. Not brought her up in every convo. Not had them in the same place. But alas it is still an issue. I don't think it is anything I can get rid of or anything that makes me a bad person,it is what it is. But I was pissed. I was into the moment and her mind was elsewhere on her. She you don't want me to touch u cus you are jealous...well fine. I won't touch you at all. And that is all I am going to say about that......
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
olympics 2008
Sunday, August 3, 2008
I wish I knew where my mind takes me.....
Anyway.....Have you ever been in love with someone and trying your best to move on but it is so hard?Especially when they are dating someone close to u? Sometimes I wish I didn't introduce her to people. And I am not saying this in a bad way but it just seems like she gets into my life to much sometimes. Don't get me wrong I am very happy with my new girl , it just takes a while to let go of the past u know??
And I know how it can be and that is why me and the new girl are taking our time. Do I love her?Not yet but we have time for that. We are still getting to know each other and she makes me happy and I want that for my friend to. It just seems that sometimes your friends have more power to hurt you then you would like for them to. People who care you about you the most sometimes,hurt you more then the people you consider the enemies. *sigh* Coming home brings up so many emotions ,and I just had to sit and listen to India Arie as I wrote this because I know I need to "Get It Together" to make my life better. Haters and more haters surround me but I will survive and come out on top. I can do all things thru Christ who strengthens me. And even thru these words I type he is healing me because he is in my thoughts. He is I and I am him. Beautiful in my skin. The things I go thru mold me into the person that I still continuing to grow and be. And I am thankful for the good and the bad. Cus without bad how boring my life would be.
Love, Peace , and Hair grease!
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Random
On another random note....I finally got to go clothes shopping!!! Since I have been dating there really hasn't been much buying for me. I spoil people when I date them(one of my downfalls) and I decided it was time for me! It felt good lol. I still haven't heard from my family. (no surprise there). And for once it doesn't bother me as much as it once use to. My money game is getting back together with less stress which is always good and hopefully it will get even better after this three check month (yyyyeeessss!)I have gotten back to writing my poetry and hopefully will be able to share soon.
I still have dreams of moving in the next year,planning all that now. It is time to let go of the boro. It has been good to me but I want "newness". Anyway enough of the random lol.
Love so exciting and new lol
Even though I had a bad night last night of sleep I am actually in a good mood today. Love is a wonderful thing and especially when you have someone to share it with. One of my old high school friends sent me the link to his wedding site today. It made me feel good to know love is still ringing true. We dated while I was in high school and I didn't take the relationship seriously. But I knew when he met his Ro ,it was a match made in heaven. I heard about it even though I was nowhere in Memphis but away at college. I was like finally they got together lol.
But it is all good. I am hoping one day soon to say that I am in a relationship. I am definitely happy where I am and I couldn't ask for anything more. Patience is a virtue. And even though I don't have the title of "girlfriend" I know where her heart is and that is what matters to me right now. I am taking things one day at a time and wishing for the best.
"Something New" ,I watched that movie last night and I think about all my single friends and why they are all single. It is because you want try something new. You have to know how you want to be treated and not shy away from that just because of how someone looks. Everybody can't have that super fine man or woman but if they superfine to you then ,you are the only one that matters.
Love ,Peace and Hairgreese!
Monday, July 28, 2008
Text Messages
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
New Love
She stays in the apartment complex I know longer work for. That within itself is funny because if I still worked there, we couldn't date. No management was allowed to date anyone on property or I would have gotten fired. So in that I feel that it was planned out that way for me not to be there. Then on the other hand it is someone that in the past I probably wouldn't have even given a chance. It is funny how you look for love and you constantly go after the same thing over and over and you get the same result. It would seem that the light bulb would come on quicker that maybe I should start looking for something new. Instead we constantly go down this same road over looking wonderful people because they aren't what we are use to. I guess this summer has been different for a lot of people. Everyone that I know that has gotten into a relationship in the past couple of months are with people that people on the outside would look at them and say....that is not a person I would have seen them with. Including me. But hell I know I am happy and so are they so screw all the rest of y'all. lol. It make me feel good to have aspects of my life finally that I don't have to thin about or worry about. I'm happy. Very Happy!.
She is so sweet,and she understands that even a little affection can go a long way. And man those kisses are wonderful lol. She is a virgin which is even more special to me because I would be the first. And that means a lot. I cherish the opportunity if I get to be. I don't have to worry about her past or who she has been with. Which is refreshing in this day and age. Sometimes it is hard to date someone especially if you are constantly hearing about what they did with whom. I don't have to worry about that with her. Actually I don't have to worry about a lot of things. She likes me and I like her and to me I am in Heaven.....
A New World
I haven't been here in a while for a good reason this time. I have a new job! And might I add a job that i actually like and depending on how the next couple of weeks go, i might can say i Love it . I know I know, its a complete 360 turn from where I was at the good ole Tar-Get but hey life goes on right? Well this wonderful new company is T-Mobile. I know I said i would never do the call center. But who else is going to put this $4.00 dollar gas in my car? But I love it so far. My training class is by far the best I have ever had at a big company,even the trainer himself. I have met a wonderful new friend,she is super cool and we have a lot in common. It's nice to have at least one buddy you can eat lunch with and not feel alone away from everyone. But our training class usually sticks together like glue ,so that isn't a problem.
The benefits are great and there are a lot of opportunities for bonuses and to move up to higher positions. Although it makes me wonder why more people don't try to. I mean since I have been in training I have applied for two jobs,cus personally I want to get back to my nice desk and my computer so I can do what I do. Plus I need to make sure that I am using my degree and getting some experience in my belt so I can get out of Tennessee. ( yes still on the move with that one) I have realized yet again that there is a new world out there for me just waiting to happen.So i have 7 more weeks of training if you include this week. two more weeks in the classroom and then we go to practicing on the phones. It seems like it is going to be a lot but what job doesn't , at the beginning.
There are a lot of things I don't get to do right now. Like go out of town ,or go to the gym. But I am not eating as much as I use to so that is still helping with the weight loss and not going out of town now means more trips in the fall. And I will have paid time off to do it. So it is not so bad. So I leave you with this public service announcement because I have to get ready for work! lol
Sunday, July 6, 2008
Summer isn't so bad.....I think
Lifestyle changes...brokeness....the worst recession I think in my young life on this earth....fighting and battling inner feelings. I have a lot going on and I am ready for my happiness. My friend just recently wrote a blog about it and well I want what she has. Not necessarily the actual things she has but I want the happiness. It would be nice to wake up and not automatically worry as soon as I open my eyes.
I have let go of some past demons I think for good. It was hard but I had to do it to move to brighter stages in my life. Now I am ready to get out of Tn. I don't know where but I want to move. My big sister is moving to New York! I don't know if I want to go that far but I want to go. I need newness and that includes my love life and work. I want a job that I can honestly say I enjoy going to if it is just to be around the people. I start a new job tomorrow. T-mobile. never thought I would really do the customer call center thing. I despise getting yelled at everyday but we will see how it goes. Yes I have a master's degree and I am still doing jobs that people with no degree do?Wonder why I am not happy? I want to know what is the secret. What do I have to say to people to get that foot in the door. I want to just walk up to one of those buildings and say look,here I AM. The BEST thing that has every happened to your company.
Summer blues and summer happiness all rolled into one.....The events I have been to have been fun and have kept me out of the house and out of my own mind. Oh what will I do with the time I have left???
Thursday, July 3, 2008
Love is a 4 letter word.
I found a great person and well I don't know if I will have a chance to prove myself. It is so hard trying to rid myself of my past without it being a issue in my present. *sigh* i just want to be happy is that possible????
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
A night of Dancing,Upsets and White Kids???
If u didn't know the white man owns us again,yes the white man I said it . B.E.T. is now owned by Viacom who also owns MTV. Now in the past year there have been a lot of changes including playing each other's rerun shows on each station and B.E.T. having all of these Awful spin off shows to try and match the awful shows on Mtv. Just play Music Video's Dammit!!!!. Anyway the B.E.T. awards gives us African-Americans a night to shine the light on ourselves. This year I must admit thanks to certain people was pretty good.
I didn't get a good intro,no Beyonce dance , no "Jennifer's" with the " I am telling you" intro.
Now we all know that Ne-Yo is a writing Genus. The man comes with hit after hit,not just for himself but for other artist as well. He has one of the hardest hitters in the game right now and does the work to back it up. His performance might have been one of the biggest shockers of the night. He danced ,he performed and he brought out the Jabberwakees. It was on-point. I was proud of the kid. It was interesting because after Usher performed they put the camera on him and he had the look that said "it was good, but I got cha lol and He did get him cus his show was a lot better lol. Then there was the young one.
Tonight was definitely about the performance and there were some good ones. The sound quality could have been better but all in all I think it was a good show!
Love peace and Hair Grease!!